Sean | 21 | Essex | Customer Service Assistant
It took four years of gentle persuasion from myself and an offer from my Mum for J to move into our home if things didn’t go to plan for my partner to finally feel ready to Come Out. I did really feel for J. He was so scared he would lose his family as they were very homophobic and would often use hateful words towards gay people on the TV. J’s older brother was the worst for this. At the time J’s brother had two children and he was so worried he would lose contact with them.
After speaking to him and asking how he wanted to do it he decided on writing a letter, leaving it on the side then packing his stuff and leaving. Some people might find this method a bit extreme but everyone has different fears and you have to Coming Out in a way you feel comfortable.
We actually wrote the letter together and asked my mum to read it over. Later that night when we knew his house would be empty we went to his house, packed up all his stuff and left the note before getting a taxi back to mine.
The next morning his mum phoned and spoke to him and told him she was shocked but was more upset at the fact that he felt he had to move out.
Things have changed a lot since then and thankfully we have been accepted by his family, including surprisingly his older brother. He does take the piss sometimes but nothing more than joking banter which we are both genuinely comfortable with. It’s now nearly a year on and J still lives with me and my parents. We are now both Out to everyone who knows us and we love it!
I wish good luck to anyone who is facing the Coming Out challenge.